MANY, MANY, MONSTERS

New monsters every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, from Ryan Rosendal
Name: Oayu
Monster #: 893,246
What Is It: Some cute little thing.
What Does It Want: Who cares?
Why Are You So Angry: He bores me.
How Do You Pronounce His Name: Who f**king knows?

Name: Oayu

Monster #: 893,246

What Is It: Some cute little thing.

What Does It Want: Who cares?

Why Are You So Angry: He bores me.

How Do You Pronounce His Name: Who f**king knows?

Name: Kruum
Monster #: 924,443
What Is It: A really disgusting, weird thing.
What Does It Want: Who knows. He’s creepy as hell though.
Yeah: It freaks me out just looking at him.
I Want To Look Away: Me too. BUT I CAN’T!!!

Name: Kruum

Monster #: 924,443

What Is It: A really disgusting, weird thing.

What Does It Want: Who knows. He’s creepy as hell though.

Yeah: It freaks me out just looking at him.

I Want To Look Away: Me too. BUT I CAN’T!!!

Monster #: 2,405
What Is It: I dunno. A monster.
What Do You Mean You Don’t Know: Damnit, we don’t know everything about every damn monster!
Why Not: Cuz we’re busy!
I Don’t Like Your Answers: Well I don’t like you!

Monster #: 2,405

What Is It: I dunno. A monster.

What Do You Mean You Don’t Know: Damnit, we don’t know everything about every damn monster!

Why Not: Cuz we’re busy!

I Don’t Like Your Answers: Well I don’t like you!

Name: Glemborr
Monster #: 9,154
What Is It: A very, very goofy monster.
Hey, Wait a Minute: What?
How Come All the Monsters This Week Are Green: I don’t know.
You’ve Been Paid Off By the Green Party, Haven’t No: What, no, we haven’t… We swear!
My God, You’re Jill Stein, Aren’t You: No! I, uh! Fine, you found me out!
But Why, Jill Stein: Power. You control one blog, you control them all. 
No…: First, this blog, then the world…

Name: Glemborr

Monster #: 9,154

What Is It: A very, very goofy monster.

Hey, Wait a Minute: What?

How Come All the Monsters This Week Are Green: I don’t know.

You’ve Been Paid Off By the Green Party, Haven’t No: What, no, we haven’t… We swear!

My God, You’re Jill Stein, Aren’t You: No! I, uh! Fine, you found me out!

But Why, Jill Stein: Power. You control one blog, you control them all. 

No…: First, this blog, then the world…

Name: Roger
Monster #: 89,265
What Is It: A very hardworking monster.
What Does It Want: To get that report done by 5:00 tonight.
Why: Because it’s very important!
I Think This Guy Works in My Dad’s Office: He does.

Name: Roger

Monster #: 89,265

What Is It: A very hardworking monster.

What Does It Want: To get that report done by 5:00 tonight.

Why: Because it’s very important!

I Think This Guy Works in My Dad’s Office: He does.

Name: The Yodeling Olf
Monster #: 234,246
What Is It: A big, green monster that yodels.
What Does It Want: To yodel, of course, ya big silly.
Why: He’s Swiss. That’s what Swiss folk do.
This Doesn’t Seem Quite Right: Shut up.

Name: The Yodeling Olf

Monster #: 234,246

What Is It: A big, green monster that yodels.

What Does It Want: To yodel, of course, ya big silly.

Why: He’s Swiss. That’s what Swiss folk do.

This Doesn’t Seem Quite Right: Shut up.

Name: Grong
Monster #: 98,235
What Is It: A very athletic, angry monster.
Why Is It Angry: He didn’t like the way you looked at him.
But I Didn’t Look At Him: He thinks you did.
Oh No! Is He Going to Attack Me: Yes.
NOOO!!! I Gotta Run: He’s faster than you. Sorry, pal.

Name: Grong

Monster #: 98,235

What Is It: A very athletic, angry monster.

Why Is It Angry: He didn’t like the way you looked at him.

But I Didn’t Look At Him: He thinks you did.

Oh No! Is He Going to Attack Me: Yes.

NOOO!!! I Gotta Run: He’s faster than you. Sorry, pal.

Name: The Showman
Monster #: 1,056
What Is It: A showman monster.
What Does It Want: He wants to put on The Greatest Show On Earth.
What Is The Greatest Show On Earth: Its destruction.
Not Much of a Show: Well, not for us.

Name: The Showman

Monster #: 1,056

What Is It: A showman monster.

What Does It Want: He wants to put on The Greatest Show On Earth.

What Is The Greatest Show On Earth: Its destruction.

Not Much of a Show: Well, not for us.

Name: The Krarn
Monster #: 56,320
What Is It: Such a cute little monster!
What Does It Want: To be fierce and scary!
Is It: Of course not! He’s Adorable!
It’s Hard Being Cute: Yes indeed!

Name: The Krarn

Monster #: 56,320

What Is It: Such a cute little monster!

What Does It Want: To be fierce and scary!

Is It: Of course not! He’s Adorable!

It’s Hard Being Cute: Yes indeed!

Name: The Dragon’s Head
Monster #: 87,205
What Is It: A… dragon’s head.
What Does It Want: To find it’s body.
How Is It Still Alive: Dragon’s can survive decapitation.
What, Really: Yes, really.
How… Annoying: You’re telling me, pal!

Name: The Dragon’s Head

Monster #: 87,205

What Is It: A… dragon’s head.

What Does It Want: To find it’s body.

How Is It Still Alive: Dragon’s can survive decapitation.

What, Really: Yes, really.

How… Annoying: You’re telling me, pal!